When I was born in 1973, I was so surprised that I didn’t talk for a year and a half. By the age of 2, after mastering English, American, Australian, South African and Canadian, I learned to cycle. I enrolled in school in 1975, finishing secondary in 1979 and completed my third masters by the age of 10.
Despite what some people say about me, I’m not lazy – I just run on energy saving mode. You know, 48 percent of the time, my brilliant ideas work every time. In the college common room, I come across as very important as I have many leather-bound books and my man bag smells of rich mahogany. They’ve done studies on me and found that not only do I look good, Adonis weeps at the sight of me. Will blog for money or a hot meal. All views my own etc., etc.
And by the way, Brian Smith!!!! Don’t act like you’re not impressed!!!